A few nights ago I didn’t have anything to do, and I got another application for Mike P. Bailey from capital one in my mailbox. So, I mustered up some coherent thought, and dialed them to be greeted by this somewhat southern 48 year old hag who sounded like she’s been chain smoking daily for the past 10 years.

I explained to them how the last call went down. How I gave cingular a fake name 3 years ago at my old address, and had called AT&T giving them information related to my real address, and my home address, and had been told that both accounts were out of their solicitation databases, and how i’d somehow started to receive applications for both mike p. bailey and paul m. bailey in my mailbox, and how no other company has records for mike p. bailey in their database except for AT&T.

Well, this woman told me straight away that AT&T never sells information to other companies. I argued that it was impossible for capital one to think mike p. bailey lives here as AT&T is the only company that has that name and this address. She then told me about how she’s been an AT&T customer for the past 30 years, and had never had any issues with them. I then began to say “i deserve compensation for this” and she immediately broke in with “wohh wohh wohh”, and actually, litterally told me, and I quote “We don’t know that!”. Can you believe that shit? The woman almost explicitly called me a liar. I never gave a single company on this planet the name of Mike p. bailey, how else could capital one make the connection between that name, and this address, without getting that information from AT&T? What the hell is this shit? AT&T just lied to me, and now i’m getting two applications per mail dropoff from random companies because AT&T wanted to make a buck off me.

It’s bad enough that they’re kicking my ass with this $60/month phone bill, and also recording my phone calls to give them to the government whenever they hint at the idea. Do they really need to butcher me threefold with this blatant abuse of my account data?

back in 2003 I was living in oxford, michigan, and I didn’t have a cell phone. So, I went up town to the bank, got $500 out, and proceeded to go to my local cingular dealer where I bought a Nokia phone that was like $400, on a prepaid plan because i didn’t want to have any bills.

While signing up for the account, i made sure to use a fake name, so I picked out a spin on my name, Mike P. bailey, but I also gave them my actual address, in case anything important happened with the account, and they needed to contact me.

Well, this all went through, and the phone ended up breaking, with absolutely no support from nokia, so I just let the prepaid account go, and never touched it. Then after a couple more months, I started getting mail addressed to Mike P. Bailey at my house, credit card applications and such. I never got into any of that, and just threw away the mail whenever i got it.

In june of this year, I ended up moving away from michigan, and was still recieving mail. After a couple of months I realized this was still happening, so I called up AT&T who bought cingular some time ago, and asked if they could just delete the mike p. bailey account. During this call, I gave AT&T my actual wireless account info, because i already had an account with them for my iphone (which they’re fucking raping me with). Well, they told me they couldn’t delete the account, but they could put my information into their ‘do not send offers’ database. “Fine, super, thank you!” I said, and happily hung up.

And I did remain happy up until yesterday afternoon, when I recieved two credit card applications from capital one: one addressed to Paul M. bailey, and one for Mike P. Bailey.

It seems that AT&T not only lied to my face, but also violated my privacy. Isn’t this kind of illegal?