Well, sometimes.

I live about 5 blocks away from us cellular stadium. Home of the white sox. The girl I’ve been seeing enjoys coming over, however there’s a problem. All of the street parking in my area is reserved for people who have a sticker which declares them a resident of the area. She doesn’t have one, nor does she have a chicago-resident sticker, because she registered her vehicle in the suburbs where it isn’t fucking expensive as shit to register your vehicle.

This presents a problem when she wants to sleep over at my place during the afternoon. If the game starts at 6, her car has to be out of the area before 2PM or else she’ll be towed. Game-Side parking? $22 god damn dollars.

I’m starting to dislike living in bridgeport. It’s far away from her, getting to work from here during the winter will be a bitch. Though, I am getting used to taking the bus. Previously, I stuck specifically to the redline train, but the cta will take me closer to work in only 2 stops. The previous route involved 1 fifteen minute walk, 1 five minute train ride, and 1 more fifteen minute walk. Now, it’s just a 6 minute walk, a 5 - 10 minute wait, and two bus transfers, from halsted street to cermak.

I have a hero. His name is Yamantaka Eye. Back in the 1980s, he was the frontman for an infamous japanese noise act called “Hanatarash”. Hanatarash was notorious for having extremely dangerous live shows. Here’s a little from wikipedia:

—
Hanatarash was notorious for its dangerous live shows. Some of the band’s most infamous shows included Eye cutting a dead cat in half with a machete, strapping a circular saw to his back and almost cutting his leg off, and destroying part of a venue with a backhoe bulldozer by driving it through the back wall and onto the stage.[2]

At a 1985 show in Tokyo’s Superloft, the audience was required to fill out waivers due to the possibility of harm caused by the show. The show was stopped due to Eye preparing to throw a lit molotov cocktail onto the stage. The performance cost ¥600,000 (approximately $6,000 US) in repairs.[3]

After several years of the intense live shows, Hanatarash was forbidden from performing at most venues, and were only allowed to return to live performances in the 1990s without the trademark danger.[3]
—

Rumor is, eye now spends his nights running into japanese bathhouses screaming in the faces of naked men. Aside from the bit about the cat, this man is my idol. And if you think the whole bit about driving a backhoe onto stage during a performance is bullshit,

Eye is a genius, and a lunatic. I think it takes a special kind of genius to pull off being a known lunatic. Listen to the entirety of this song. It’s probably the most melodic hanatarash tune to be produced, and I can’t seem to stop listening to it today.

On monday I had a date with su, and she’d been bugging me to chop off all my hair, so before I met up with her I went to hair cuttery to get all of my hair cut off.

It wasn’t because she’d recommended I do it. Several people had told me to do it, so I figured chopping it all down could only improve things.

So, I have no hair now, and life’s a little better. A college-aged girl on the street smiled at me yesterday, the security guards in the building all complimented it, and best of all, su finds it totally adorable.

before:

after:

Bye

Yesterday, Roomie-Ex Alison moved out.

Yippy.

She’s moving up to boystown with her project/boyfriend because he cannot afford to live in his current residence.

Nor can she afford to live anywhere, as her mother continues to pay her rent to this day in the 35th year of her life.

So, me and derek are now left without the sounds of her shrieking voice, attempting to express indecipherable lyrics that she wrote in her notebook which I believe contains sheets of baby skin rather than normal paper (its just her style)

That’s all, bye

I refuse to see the new batman movie.

To start, batman isn’t even a superhero. He’s just a guy that dresses up like a bat and attempts to fight crime. He is routinely beat up by his ‘normal guy’ enemies, and gets hurt from things like punches, shoves, and the like.

Take away the ’superhero’ element, you have a movie about a guy who dresses up like a bat, and tries to fight crime.

Oh wait, it’s a drama? A guy dressed up like a bat is the main character in a drama? Alright, i’m out.

Note: I am NOT the mike he is referring to

Dear ub3r,

This is a reminder about your post(s) or other actions at WebHostingTalk Forums.

The moderator who issued this reminder has this message for you:

=======================================
I am removing your signature based on the following rule:

“You may not link, in any manner, to sites or images containing pornography, sexually explicit, gross violence, or are determined by moderators to be detrimental to the community.”

The link to your blog contains numerous discussions about getting high and other drug use. This isn’t appropriate for the community and folks have started to link to those specifics in threads.

*<a href=”http://imikey.com” target=”_blank”>If you won’t feel as good, then i won’t feel as cheap</a>*
=======================================

ahahaha

Around 4pm I got motivated, so I went outside, and got on my bike. I decided that a trip to leonard would be nice, as I hadn’t rode the pollyann trail since last summer.

So, I hopped on the trail, and hammered the first 3 miles to lake george road, and was feeling pretty good. So, I continued down the trail, and this went on for a littel while, until I finally reached downtown leonard. In downtown Leonard, my odometer read 6 miles.

In downtown leonard I stopped by a party store, and got an energy drink because those usually help. While I was standing around, I got the bright idea to take the roads back to oxford. So, I took a look around, and tried to figure out which direction would take me back to oxford. I decided to head up what I remember to be “elmwood road”. This would prove to be my biggest mistake of at least the past year.

So, I rode elmwood in hopes that I would soon find a dirt road of some kind, but this did not happen. The road was very hilly, and I told myself that I would not turn around and ride it again because I hated the hills, mistake #2.

As I continued down the road, I saw a sign which read “welcome to Dryden, where kindness is served country style” or some shit. I’m not well versed with the order of towns, and thought that I might be in the route to oxford. Mistake #3.

I continued down these roads, having no idea where I was, or what direction I was traveling in. Eventually I learned that I was in fact on rochester road. I could not see the sun because it was so cloudy, so I had no way of telling if i was headed north, south, east, or west. I only had faith that I would reach oxford before Tuesday. Also on my mind was the risk that it was going to start raining. Thankfully, god granted me this pardon.

I continued down rochester road for an unknown distance, at least 15 miles. The sun finally poked through, and I could see that it was east. I checked the time on my computer, and i had been on the bike for 1.5 hours. The sun sets at 8pm I remembered, so I decided I’d better hurry or else i’d be really fucked.

In the middle of nowhere, I saw a sign advertising a business which said it was on Lake George Road, which was off some other road, i can’t remember. I took a turn on this road, and finally found lake george road. However, it was paved. I had never been on the paved section of lake george road, I didn’t even know it was paved. Regardless, I continued on this road in hopes that I would reach oxford.

Lake george road is an extremely long road. I travelled down this thing for at least an hour and a half, when I finally saw a sign that scared the fuck out of me: “Welcome to Oakland County”. “Are you fucking kidding me!?” I shouted in the middle of the woods. I continued down this road; thirsty, exhausted, afraid, nervous, and pissed off, all at the same time. I finally waved a car down, and asked the older gentleman inside where I was. He told me that I was about 5 miles from lakeville road. “Oh happy day” i said to myself. I hopped back on my bike, and rushed as quickly as I could down lake george road, and after about 20 minutes I was finally at the entrance back to the pollyann trail. I got off my bike, and stumbled around, trying to gain some sanity after what i’d been through. I felt as if I’d been molested by the road commission. Why can’t we have public map posts? Just a sign that shows the roads, and have a star where we are. The mall has one at every entrance. Why can’t roads?

I continued back down the pollyann trail for the remaining 3 miles. I couldn’t feel my arms, or feet. My neck was aching, my ass was numb, my vision had blurred, and i had sweat dripping from my nose. I rocked down the trail, and finally got home. When I got home, I dropped my bike on the lawn, and fell down. “I made it” I thought to myself. I then stepped inside, and had a cup of water, and a couple of hot dogs for dinner.

Maybe I’ll do this some other time. It was quite the trip.

Hello There,

On Monday I hung out with Victoria. We got high, and saw pan’s labyrinth. Then got high again, and somewhere during those three activities something regrettable, and unmentionable was done. A few people know. The rest of you don’t need to know. Just know that I only did it once, and I don’t plan on doing it ever again. Okay? Great.

On Tuesday I woke up feeling completely awesome. So, I got on the internet, and chilled out. Then around 4:30 i went out for a bike ride. That bike ride took me down seymour lake road, onto baldwin road, up oakwood road, and back down m24 into town where I crossed the bridge, and went back home. The total trip was 16 miles. On oakwood road I had to speed really really fast to avoid some cars. I did get splashed by a car as it drove through a puddle. It was all in good fun. I didn’t crash or die.

A few photos were taken on the trip:

I’m happy.

That’s all for today. Hopefully tomorrow is just as nice, and this string of wonderful days can continue.

I’m still wearing a lot of my fat man clothes around the house. They’re pretty comfortable, and because they’re so big, they do an excellent job of keeping me warm.

When I have to go out, I usually buy a new shirt that’ll fit me normally. I currently have 4 of these shirts, 3 of which were purchased at Vintage Vantage. Vintage Vantage has some cool shirts. They wouldn’t look as good as if I were still a fat man, but then again, neither would anything.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that I gained 5 pounds during this winter-time exercise hiatus. That sent me into a rage, so I started doing a lot of situps. I’m going to continue doing these situps until I’m hot, since that is the goal of this whole weight loss thing. I can do about 65 situps in 2 minutes. I’m currently doing 200 of them per night, but I’m increasing the allotment by 50 to 100 every week.

I think my round of dealing with women is dead for the year. I must say, I’m pretty disappointed with the way this whole thing turned out. But that’s just the way things are when you live in a town full of fickle bitches. No, not every girl was like that, but a few were, and they’ve turned me off of the whole lot of them. This is for the best though. With all of that bullshit out of my way, I’ll have a better chance of helping society.

I’m supposed to meet a dude named drew for lunch today. He’s supposed to give me some tips on becoming a crowd pleaser. I originally met drew a couple weeks ago at victoria de oxford’s party. While speaking with him online, he told me what I’ve always known to be the truth: I’m a terrible person who mumbles, and slurs incoherently whenever I deal with anyone in public. Well, he didn’t tell me all that, but that was pretty much the gist of it.

That’s about it for now. Have a nice day, everyone.