Around 4pm I got motivated, so I went outside, and got on my bike. I decided that a trip to leonard would be nice, as I hadn’t rode the pollyann trail since last summer.

So, I hopped on the trail, and hammered the first 3 miles to lake george road, and was feeling pretty good. So, I continued down the trail, and this went on for a littel while, until I finally reached downtown leonard. In downtown Leonard, my odometer read 6 miles.

In downtown leonard I stopped by a party store, and got an energy drink because those usually help. While I was standing around, I got the bright idea to take the roads back to oxford. So, I took a look around, and tried to figure out which direction would take me back to oxford. I decided to head up what I remember to be “elmwood road”. This would prove to be my biggest mistake of at least the past year.

So, I rode elmwood in hopes that I would soon find a dirt road of some kind, but this did not happen. The road was very hilly, and I told myself that I would not turn around and ride it again because I hated the hills, mistake #2.

As I continued down the road, I saw a sign which read “welcome to Dryden, where kindness is served country style” or some shit. I’m not well versed with the order of towns, and thought that I might be in the route to oxford. Mistake #3.

I continued down these roads, having no idea where I was, or what direction I was traveling in. Eventually I learned that I was in fact on rochester road. I could not see the sun because it was so cloudy, so I had no way of telling if i was headed north, south, east, or west. I only had faith that I would reach oxford before Tuesday. Also on my mind was the risk that it was going to start raining. Thankfully, god granted me this pardon.

I continued down rochester road for an unknown distance, at least 15 miles. The sun finally poked through, and I could see that it was east. I checked the time on my computer, and i had been on the bike for 1.5 hours. The sun sets at 8pm I remembered, so I decided I’d better hurry or else i’d be really fucked.

In the middle of nowhere, I saw a sign advertising a business which said it was on Lake George Road, which was off some other road, i can’t remember. I took a turn on this road, and finally found lake george road. However, it was paved. I had never been on the paved section of lake george road, I didn’t even know it was paved. Regardless, I continued on this road in hopes that I would reach oxford.

Lake george road is an extremely long road. I travelled down this thing for at least an hour and a half, when I finally saw a sign that scared the fuck out of me: “Welcome to Oakland County”. “Are you fucking kidding me!?” I shouted in the middle of the woods. I continued down this road; thirsty, exhausted, afraid, nervous, and pissed off, all at the same time. I finally waved a car down, and asked the older gentleman inside where I was. He told me that I was about 5 miles from lakeville road. “Oh happy day” i said to myself. I hopped back on my bike, and rushed as quickly as I could down lake george road, and after about 20 minutes I was finally at the entrance back to the pollyann trail. I got off my bike, and stumbled around, trying to gain some sanity after what i’d been through. I felt as if I’d been molested by the road commission. Why can’t we have public map posts? Just a sign that shows the roads, and have a star where we are. The mall has one at every entrance. Why can’t roads?

I continued back down the pollyann trail for the remaining 3 miles. I couldn’t feel my arms, or feet. My neck was aching, my ass was numb, my vision had blurred, and i had sweat dripping from my nose. I rocked down the trail, and finally got home. When I got home, I dropped my bike on the lawn, and fell down. “I made it” I thought to myself. I then stepped inside, and had a cup of water, and a couple of hot dogs for dinner.

Maybe I’ll do this some other time. It was quite the trip.

Hello There,

On Monday I hung out with Victoria. We got high, and saw pan’s labyrinth. Then got high again, and somewhere during those three activities something regrettable, and unmentionable was done. A few people know. The rest of you don’t need to know. Just know that I only did it once, and I don’t plan on doing it ever again. Okay? Great.

On Tuesday I woke up feeling completely awesome. So, I got on the internet, and chilled out. Then around 4:30 i went out for a bike ride. That bike ride took me down seymour lake road, onto baldwin road, up oakwood road, and back down m24 into town where I crossed the bridge, and went back home. The total trip was 16 miles. On oakwood road I had to speed really really fast to avoid some cars. I did get splashed by a car as it drove through a puddle. It was all in good fun. I didn’t crash or die.

A few photos were taken on the trip:

I’m happy.

That’s all for today. Hopefully tomorrow is just as nice, and this string of wonderful days can continue.

I’m still wearing a lot of my fat man clothes around the house. They’re pretty comfortable, and because they’re so big, they do an excellent job of keeping me warm.

When I have to go out, I usually buy a new shirt that’ll fit me normally. I currently have 4 of these shirts, 3 of which were purchased at Vintage Vantage. Vintage Vantage has some cool shirts. They wouldn’t look as good as if I were still a fat man, but then again, neither would anything.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that I gained 5 pounds during this winter-time exercise hiatus. That sent me into a rage, so I started doing a lot of situps. I’m going to continue doing these situps until I’m hot, since that is the goal of this whole weight loss thing. I can do about 65 situps in 2 minutes. I’m currently doing 200 of them per night, but I’m increasing the allotment by 50 to 100 every week.

I think my round of dealing with women is dead for the year. I must say, I’m pretty disappointed with the way this whole thing turned out. But that’s just the way things are when you live in a town full of fickle bitches. No, not every girl was like that, but a few were, and they’ve turned me off of the whole lot of them. This is for the best though. With all of that bullshit out of my way, I’ll have a better chance of helping society.

I’m supposed to meet a dude named drew for lunch today. He’s supposed to give me some tips on becoming a crowd pleaser. I originally met drew a couple weeks ago at victoria de oxford’s party. While speaking with him online, he told me what I’ve always known to be the truth: I’m a terrible person who mumbles, and slurs incoherently whenever I deal with anyone in public. Well, he didn’t tell me all that, but that was pretty much the gist of it.

That’s about it for now. Have a nice day, everyone.

I met the myspace lady victoria tonight. She was pretty cool. We met over at casa real, and drank some alcohol. Then went back to her house and smoked a lot of pot.

That was fun.

Supposed to go to her house later tonight for more drinking with her compadres. I wonder if they’ll like me.. Hopefully.

That’s all from this corner of the internet. Have a nice day everyone.

Well hello there, john q. reader. I suppose I’ll let you in on what’s happening in the life of your fearless hero.

1) Not going outside
Mother nature doesn’t like me, and has forced me to stay inside. I’ve shoveled a few times, but i haven’t gotten very far from the house.

2) Myspace
Yeah, I previously swore off it, but it seems like the only way to keep contact with the local area.

3) A Girl
About a week ago I met a girl named Victoria on myspace. She seems to believe I’m worth something, and enjoys my photography. She has described me as one of the most interesting people she has ever met. We’ll see if that opinion sticks in the long term. I’m due to meet victoria and her friends this saturday, at a party which will be happening at her place. Her place is down town.

4) Anger.
Work has made me hate the internet, and I get stressed out any time I’m called upon. A few days ago I had a melt down, and just started cursing at my boss. She seemed okay with it. That helped me vent the stress.

5) Vista
I was running it for a few months, and i had good luck with. So, I bought it just to avoid the hassles of having to deal with cracking activation so often. When i got it, i had problems de-pirating my current vista, and I was forced, yes forced, to reinstall windows. Windows was reinstalled with my new legal copy of windows, and things are pretty fine.

That’s about it. Take care everybody.

Peter came over today asking for help with his laptop. He was complaining that he needed a cd key for office 2003. I couldn’t find one, so we went the long route and downloaded office 2007 for him.

While we waited for the download, we just sat around and had a chat. I noticed early on that he had taken a little glance at my ipod. I ignored it, and figured he was just checking it out to compare it to the one he has at home.

Then I remembered that I needed $5 to send a shirt back to LA for a return. So, I asked peter for $5. He said he didn’t have on him, but he would go to the ATM to get it. I said “ohh, forget it.” then he insisted, and left.

As he left, i noticed he started driving towards his house, instead of the ATM location. I then looked up and noticed my ipod was gone. He had left his laptop sitting there on my desk, so he had no choice but to come back. Sure enough, he returned 15 minutes later.

As he entered the door, I put on my serious voice and asked him where my ipod was;

Mikey: Where is my ipod peter?
Peter: Ohh, you mean this one? (pulls ipod out of pocket)
Mikey: Why is my ipod in your pocket peter?
Peter: Ohh, I just wanted to check it out.
Mikey: I didn’t tell you you could have it.
Peter: ohh, it’s no big deal. Here man, here’s your ipod (handing me an ipod)
Mikey: (looking over ipod, it’s extremely scratched up, the screen is extremely messed up, and it’s filled with a lot of rap music that i would never listen to, not even if you paid me) This isn’t my ipod peter. Can you go get my ipod please?
Peter: Sure man, oh wait, I don’t have an ipod. What would I need an ipod for? my phone has a cell phone camera
Mikey: You have an ipod. I saw it the last time I was at your house. You told me it had a dead battery.
Peter: What? When did you see my ipod? I don’t have an ipod
Mikey: yes you do peter. Can you go get my ipod?
Peter: (stands there for 3 minutes, silently looking at his ipod)
Mikey: Go get my ipod.
Peter: Okay

Another 10 minutes pass. Laptop is still on my desk, I’m happy with how i’m handling the situation. Peter finally returns.

Mikey: Do you have my ipod?
Peter: yeah man, I’m sorry. (handing me ipod)
Mikey: Why does my screen turn on?
Peter: ohh, the battery isn’t charged
Mikey: (plugging in portable charger), looks like you’re right.
Peter: Look man, I’m really sorry. i wanted to give you this (hands me some $20 watch, probably also stolen). It needs some batteries, but It is my favorite watch.
Mikey: That’s great. Thanks. You can leave now
Peter: What? What do you mean?
Mikey: I’m not going to fix your computer for you. You tried to rob me.
Peter: Uhhh, uhhh, uhh, (he needs this fix for his college class which is in a few hours)
Mikey: I’ll tell you what, I’ll do this if you give me another $10.
Peter: (Throws $10 and other $5 onto desk)
Mikey: Thanks peter.
Peter: (10 minutes worth of awkward silence)
Mikey: You know, everyone in high school knew you were a liar.
Peter: (shell shocked)

Peter didn’t talk for the rest of the trip. I did the 15 minutes worth of work, and his computer now has office 2007. It was a pretty nice adventure. I started the day with no money, and now I have $15, enough to buy the packaging stuff to send my shirt return back. If it weren’t for peter, I would have no money now.

I told the family about it, and they were pretty livid. I had already decided to ban him from the house, and they reinforced it.

I’m pretty happy.

Earlier tonight my grandmother called my mom up and told her about how my aunt chris thinks she found a website in which i tell people “how to trash women”. Mom asked me about it, and i just laughed and asked “what?”. Then the conversation progressed, and I guess grandma convinced my mom that I had made this website, and was instructing the masses, despite the fact that ‘i have no women’.

After mom got off the phone she started badgering me, saying “chris knows all about computers”, when it’s obvious that she doesn’t know anything. Dad woke up in the middle of this badgering, and start sticking up for me. That erupted into a big screaming match with the three of us.

I can understand grandma maybe thinking I started the website, since she doesn’t really know anything about the internet. She probably believes I’m the only person running the internet. However, I don’t really get why aunt chris would start going after me.

Chris has some recent history with this family which relates to her leaving uncle brian, and getting him sent to jail. Dad thinks she going after me to help gain some credibility with the rest of the family, but I don’t understand why she picked me out of everyone else.

I don’t get it. I guess I’ll try and call aunt chris to figure out what she thinks she found, if she even found anything.

hey man

i’m just chilling out here. I have had a pretty long day. christmas went swimmingly. i got a new bike helmet and it’s better than the old broken one, some clothes, and some money.

The first trip of the day was to the mom’s mom’s house. That was an alright time. We were pretty late because dad had to drive nana to over to a meetup point where she was picked up by uncle luke. We got there about 10 minutes before dinner 1, and weren’t even the last people to get there. The food was alright though.

I did make a giant mistake, that’s probably going to make somebody sad. Grandma always gives people in our generation a card with some money in it. Well, I took the money out, and put it in my pocket. Then, i put the card back in the envelope, and put it on the table. I ended up walking away from it, and in the end forgot all about it, and left without it I’m hoping grandma doesn’t get upset if she finds the card there without the money. I’ll probably call her tomorrow to cover my bases.

Trip two was to uncle Luke’s house all the way in Davidson. So, we all drove there, and chilled out for a while. He gave me a shirt that was two sizes too big for me, and a blockbuster gift certificate for $20. I don’t know what i can get at blockbuster, but i’ll stop by there next time I’m in the area. Anyway, the stay there was spent watching tv, eating a little food, using luke’s exercise bike, and playing poker with the other side of the mess. Their side does have some good points, but the chain smoking stained my new shirt with this terrible stench.

After several hours of their house, we left with nana. There wasn’t any snow outside, but it was raining, and that made expressway driving extra fun. Dad almost ran into a couple of people, but we made it out okay. The car argued with nana about republicans vs. democrats for a little while, and then we all got back home safely.

At home, we setup the phone i bought them. It has three handsets, so we all get a phone. It has all kinds of wacky features, and yeah, that’s pretty cool.

I really think we should replace all this commercial bullshit with boxing day. I’m not a fan of religion, but it seems kind of bad to run over some people’s religious beliefs with all this ridiculous commercial shit.

There’s my post. See you later

Evening Gents,
on sunday night i didn’t really want to sleep so i didn’t

then monday i lounged around, and did laundry

around 4 i got an idea to go out biking, i was thinking “push the limit” for some reason.

so i put on some very thick gloves since it was very cold outside, and i also put on a winter coat, and some pants, and my winter hat under my helmet, and I went out biking for a while. When i started biking, i noticed two things: one, my brakes were tighter, much more sensitive to the touch. Two, i couldn’t really feel anything with these gloves on.

I biked for a very long time, about 13 miles, and on this dirt road, it was unusually bumpy, so i turned off the compression in my shock to help keep everything stable during the ride, and that worked out for a while.

Then i was on a regular sidewalk in town, when I got a ridiculous idea to turn compression in my shock back on. So, i sort of leaned over so i could slide the little gauge off, but i had forgotten that the compression off, so i immediately dipped when i leaned onto the handlebars, and then because i wasn’t completely aware, i accidentally applied full pressure to the front brake.

That sent me straight over the handlebars, and my bike over me. I naturally went straight to the ground, and didn’t feel any immediate pain. When i moved over, my elbow hurt a little, and so did my wrist. Apparently i rolled into the crash, and managed to not damage my face. I did hurt my abs, and my elbow, though it’s nothing serious.

When I got up, i was covered in flowers, and my bike was upside down, rear tire in this bucket of flowers, completely backwards. I didn’t feel bad, i looked over at the people in traffic, stopped at a stoplight, and one women smiled at me. I smiled back, and things were pretty cool.

I picked the bike up, and the little thing that my computer mounts on had snapped in half. I managed to fix that when i got back home. That’s about it.

No noticeable damage was done to the bike. I didn’t ride today because my abs still hurt, and it got dark too quickly. That’s about it.

Have a nice day, people.

Evening folks,

I’ve been busy this week. Here is what i did this week

Monday
passed out candy for halloween

Tuesday
Didn’t sleep monday night, stayed up all day waiting for fedex to come. Fedex came at 5pm, long after ups, DHL, and even the USPS. They gave me my camera, i messed around with it, and then at 7 dad got home with my bike. Trek turned out to be awesome awesome, and they upgraded me to an 2007 8000 frame, up from my 2005 6700 frame. Here’s a picture of the new bike: http://a.photos.cx/bikenew-b3c.jpg . Also, my new camera came. It’s a nikon n80. I bought it from Ankit who owns cernax hosting, and he threw in a whole bunch of extra stuff, including a 75 - 210mm sigma lens, a bag, 5 rolls of kodak film, and all kinds of other, super-awesome stuff. Here’s a photo of the camera: http://a.photos.cx/nikon002-424.jpg. I woke up with a zit, and it was swollen. I tried popping it, but nothing came of it.

Wednesday
went out on bike. Did 14 miles. Zit is the same size

Thursday
Zit has swollen up a little

Friday
Some terrible misinformed person tells me that putting a heating pad on the swollen zit will loosen things up. I stupidly follow their advice

Saturday
Face is balooned up greatly. It’s hard to see out of my left eye. Person changes their mind, and remembers that heat makes things swell up more, and it’s ice that makes things swell down. I still ride 6 miles that day. Later that night, I tare open the zit, and squeeze out this ridiculously full peice of puss. After that, I bleed for a while, but I do manage to get a lot of bad stuff out of my face.

And now we’re at Sunday. I finished my first wheel of film. I’ll be taking it to the local professional darkroom for development later this week. I talked with their head technician, and they say they can do all kinds of stuff, like scan extremely high quality, 20+MB tiffs for me, and print large, canvas-quality images. The name of the place is “Oxford one hour photo”. Hopefully they’ll do a good job.