So, i ended up going out at about 11pm the other night for drinking. I didn’t have anyone to drink with, but i needed something to do and felt booze would ok to consume. I had a train to catch early in the morning, so I decided to stay local to bport and drink at a bar called Mitchell’s.
I’ve talked about mitchell’s before. There are 4 bars within a few blocks of me, half of which are inhabitable by good people, but all bars seem to attract at least a small majority of dickheads.
Well, I stumbled my way through the snow, and got to mitchell’s after about 10 minutes. I then stood outside the bar for a few minutes and smoked a cigarette. While I was smoking, my neighbor mike walked up to me and started bragging like he always does about knowing someone who owns the bar. I usually silently doubt mike, because I’ve caught him lying to me many times before, but he seemed pent on drinking with me in this bar, and I really couldn’t dodge him. So, we walked in, and sat down.
Mike immediately left my side, and went to the other side of the bar and started talking to some guy he knows. “god i hope he’s gone” i thought to myself. I know mike doesn’t have a job, I know that he’s probably going to try and get me to pay for his drinks, and I know that I’m too weak to say no to the guy. Well, mike was over on the other side of the bar trying to scam drinks out of that guy, and I was sitting by myself waiting for the bartender to stop small chat with the other patron.
Ten minutes later, I’m still staring at the bartender waiting to order my pint of guiness, and he finally noticed me. The bar wasn’t crowded, but I guess he was preoccupied, and simply didn’t notice me. When he came over, he gave me a free pint of guiness to say sorry, and I began to drink.
Halfway through the glass, mike returns to the bar stool next to me, and shortly after walks up the guy he was talking to in the corner. Apparently the guy did know mike from previous encounters, but i didn’t really care. Mike’s friend was about the same age as him, and much bigger than him. Mike continually referred to him as “the kush man” because he’s a fucking idiot and loves to talk about weed all the time despite never having anything of actual quality. I’ve spent hours deseeding the shit he’s sold me when I first moved to the neighborhood, and I’ve smoked with him out of his personal supply, and he never has good stuff. I have 20 year old nerd white guy friends who have better pot than him. Mike exaggerates everything he has in his life, and will continue to serve as an example of why it is bad for a person to have a big ego for the rest of time.
Well, mike asks me what I’m drinking, i tell him what i’m drinking, and he starts to brag about some bullshit he drinks that’s imported from mexico and sold at the rate of $5.50/tinyfuckingbottle. He’s currently drinking out of one of those ridiculous 16oz bottles of bud light that they’ve been selling. “oh yeah?” i say to him, “have you ever had guiness?”. He seemed ignorant to the ways of dark beer, so I let him have a sip. “thats not bad man, but modello is so much better”. He would then go on to order a modello, but never offered me a sip. “Great job selling modello, mike” i think to myself.
Mike’s friend was drinking the same thing as mike, but didn’t seem nearly as enthused about the situation. Mike would eventually walk outside to smoke a cigarette, and his friend would tell me that he doesn’t know how to talk to mike, because he doesn’t believe a word that the guy says. “you too, huhh?” i say. “yeah, i guess…” responds the older gentleman.
Mike would eventually return, and when his friend left he began to call him the n word, and told me that his friend is a coke addict.
When Mike left, his friend started talking to me, and then told me that he would be going down the street a few blocks to buy some coke. “oh, what kind of price?” i asked, having not done coke in roughly 2 years, and having only done it once, I was well overdue for a miniparty. He gave me a small rundown of some prices I couldn’t afford, and I ended up just telling him that i was alright with the pot i have in my desk at home.
Well, mike came back, and showed off some of his tattoos, one of which is his wife’s name “particia” written in cursive across his forearm. He then went on to rant about how his wife is worried about him going out to bars, which i don’t blame her, but i don’t want to get in an argument with mike tonight because i know he’ll take everything way too far.
As the night progressed mike would drink the modello, and I bought him a carbomb because he’s never had one, which he completely fucked up by pouring the shot into the glass rather than dropping the shot into the glass, and he drank more budweiser because he doesn’t know any better, and eventually came time for him to go leave with his cokehead friend to buy drugs in the bad part of town.
“hey mike, can you give me 5 bucks?’ he says. I’m already a little drunk, and a fulltime pushover, so i throw him 5 bucks. Then he says again “sorry mike, can i have another five?”, “no, i’m not going to give you 10 dollars when I’ve already bought you a drink tonight”, “come on mike, i don’t want to look like an asshole” he says, “fuck off” i say.
He paid his tab, and left the bartender a dollar tip for well over an hour and a half of service that was riddled with free drinks from the bartender for some reason.
After mike left I was still there. THe bartender came back, saw the dollar tip, and had a disappointed look on his face. I would go on to drink a pint of bell’s lager, and left the bartender a $28 tip to make the bartender feel better about being fucked over by mike.
I then stumbled across the street and grabbed a couple of chicken tortas, and began hiking back. When I reached wallace, the street I live on, I began walking south, and as I was walking back into my home I could hear a faint yelling. Sure enough, it was mike. he was upset, probably because I wouldn’t give him the money he needed to impress the bartender with a fancy tip. I then decided that he wasn’t worth the time, and went into my building.
The following day, I took amtrak out to bloomington, IL, and drank a completely unhealthy amount of alcohol with some friends who own a tech company out there. Over the course of 6 hours we each drank roughly 10 to 14 pints of guiness, 4 carbombs, and i drank a couple of glasses of wine for good measure. At the end of the night we had run up a bill of about $400 for their company credit card, I had been given a job offer that would require I move to bloomington to teach their staff for 6 months, and later move to new york to manage their datacenter. They say they’re prepared to offer me 48k, but i’m really not sure if I want to leave my current job and chicago. I do kind of want out of this city, because the lack of social contact is really killing me, and i believe i could use a fresh start in a new city, but i’m also pretty sure none of my social habits will change, and I’d probably be more lonely out there.
